Coca-Cola has a new President and Chief Operating Officer. Muhtar Kent assumes the new position immediately (heh). When I saw the story this morning, it reminded me of my trip to Atlanta a few years ago, and more specifically the World o’ Coke museum. It reminded me of the $6.00 I spent to learn about Coke, watch their commercials and learn about Coca-Cola’s history. It reminded me that I stood in line for 45 minutes to experience the World o’ Coke, and that while waiting in line, I bought a small can of overpriced Coke, because Atlanta in July can get a little bit humid.
I’m at the World o’ Coke in Atlanta in 2003
Not only did I visit the World o’ Coke, I took a picture with the Polar Bear
These girls asked me to take their picture, or something like that
If you’ve never been to the Coke museum, you’ve missed a giant commercial. Amazingly, I couldn’t believe how busy the place was. I stood in line just to read about the beginnings of Coke. I learned how Coke began. How it expanded, and the desires of the founders of Coca-Cola to make Coca-Cola available to anyone, anywhere throughout the world. I learned of the god-like status of the early Coke pioneers in the areas of marketing and product recognition. I learned that Coke is better than any other soft drink company. And I learned that Coke had patented their soft drink bottle. I watched Coke commercials throughout the ages. I watched Coke commercials in other languages. I watched a demonstration on how Cherry Coke and Vanilla Coke came to exist.
Interestingly enough, I think Coke likes people referring to soda as “coke” regardless of brand. A friend in college used to refer to any soft drink as “coke.” Short refers to soda as “pop.” This is an ongoing debate, and others have put much more time and effort into the debate. I’ll just state that my position is that “soda” or “soft drink” makes you sound more intelligent than “coke” or “pop”.
I would advise against spending a couple of hours of your life in the World o’ Coke. Instead, spend your time at the downtown Hooter’s and ask for Anneliese. I have no idea if she’s still there, but she’s much more aesthetically pleasing than brown, carbonated, caffeinated sugar water. She serves barley water and hot wings with a smile.
That hooters chick is phenomenal. Look at that “come hither” smile. Wow.
Your Hooters/Coke story inspired to write a story about a trip to Hooters that I once had. Geil, Greg Paul, Mike Bass, JoshO, Amanda and some randoms (sorry Lindsay) were at Hooters on Trivia night. We were answering questions like mad men… Christopher Walken, Red Dawn, The Bi-Centenial Celebration of Ecuador Massacre, couldn’t miss an answer. But this other team, the Dirty Drunks, who had their laptops, pda’s, and that Ken Jennings fag from Jeopardy on their team, managed to tie us after the first game. So it came down to the tiebreaker. We called in our Ace, Ryan Geil. Why is he our ace? I’ll tell you why. The man oozes Machismo but at the same time he is as soft as a down comforter. He has a penchant for being our best (except for me) trivia player. Anyways. We call in Geil. Who does the other team pick? A massive mammoth of a man, we shall call him Thor for anonimity purposes. He must have been 7 feet tall and weighed at least 6 stone,. Why am I telling you so much about his physical attributes? Because the super tie breaker challenge was…….A FUCKING ARM WRESTLING MATCH! Geil was not phased. He said, ” I am going to to take this fucker down like I was Lincoln Hawk in Over The Top.” Thor took a bite of his barbed wire sandwich and came over to the table. As the two competitors sat down everyone knew that it was going to be on like donkey kong. The two specemins clasped hands with a thunderous slap that it made Short fall off his chair. The mood was tense, sweat was dripping, the tension was high, the hopes and dreams of two rival nations we in the arms of two men. It was now go time. Then Geil lost.
Hope you all (the 3 readers of JeremyOswald.com) enjoyed that.
One added note. This was last night.
Loved the story Vinnie, you really have a swell grasp of similies and metaphors. Very descriptive, but too predictable. I knew Geil would lose. It’s not like we’re living in Boston Legal, where the good guys always win, even seemingly impossible cases. Unless the opposing team were the good guys, in which case life is like a TV show. And judging by the company you were keeping last night, the Dirty Drunks were the good guys.
Seriously, Jeremy. Is this some sort of reverse psychology readership poll? Toss out a few insults that merit a response and track your hits that way? Don’t you have some sort of fancy pants Dan-ware that does this for you?
Jeremy…thank you for the confidence. I wish you could have been there to take my place as Thor almost broke my wrist. Too bad it wasn’t a “Who’s hotter and why…Misha Barton or Paris Hilton” short answer question…you would have won for sure. And they probably would have given bonus points for your stories about meeting them.
Paris Hilton, because she has a sex tape and she’s richer. Plus, Marissa Cooper was no fun. Maybe if you weren’t so limp wristed, you would’ve had a shot at Thor.
Me limp wristed? That was Lamar from Revenge of the Nerds, but I can see how you could mistake the two of us.
while rolling in laughter at this stream of comments, i wonder why this group of creative and sarcastic geniuses can’t somehow use their talents in a more productive way than wasting time on jeremyoswald.com or drinking themselves stupid at Fridays…i mean, people are making millions off donuts, christmas decorations and organizing services…come on, people - let’s get rich